I am still going through my second divorce (3 years later from the time she committed adultery during a family vacation with my kids), from the same person, with two young boys and one marriage. This article goes the route of guidance in support of separation with the least costly implication... i tried to go this route involving mediators and counselors (the high road.. the good road - thinking that logic and civility would kick in) and when i would request my ex to join me she wouldn't show up and i ended up paying the bills in the cancellation of these meetings.... this and many other expenses even toll highway treks as she drove to visit her previous boyfriend at shady motels while i was at home taking care of the boys - yes i paid the bill for these.. unbelievable. I believe the use of the transponder in going out to visit this loser that prayed on my family was a method of evil virtue signalling and evil method of payback knowing i would see this on my bills.... or does she have a mental issue. Only time will tell i suppose... just need to protect my boys and my family.
If you are in a similar situation - you must take control of the situation and get far away. Do not give the narcissist any power or control of you or your kids; you need to fight it as depression and anxiety is continuously telling your brain to shutdown. Do not get involved in petty squabbles and try to not focus on the small nonsense. Your ex and their lawyer will try to push what is known as an amygdala hijack and you have to fight human nature to fall into the trap. https://www.healthline.com/health/stress/amygdala-hijack#symptoms - also as a male you will find out when being in constant crisis your cortisol levels we be at its peak continuously and your testosterone will plummet as a result... further affecting you in your train of thought and inability to cope with the problems/attacks coming at you.
You see in this below chat that i had war declared on me... and btw the silver collection was something that we handed down through generations and it had to go back to my mother - it would have crushed her otherwise had it gone to a pawn shop. I was trying to trim the dog and fix my car... she held my tools and my animal shears hostage (similar to the old couch story in the toronto star article below). - you see the reaction which ensued.. completely rational and its the same today.
be strong you will get through this - keep away from people that try to pull you into drugs and alcohol abuse. find people that will empower you.
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